© 2021, Jenny Rose. All rights reserved.
When we teach Parent and Child swim classes, most of what we teach is for the parents. Holds, encouragement, how to demonstrate skills, the importance of trust, safety, and initiating lots of play are among the highlights. One of the things we talk about is the “Terrible Toos.” Too far. Too many repetitions. Too tired. Too scared. Too hot or cold. Too hungry. Too thirsty. Too much sun. All of these impact a child’s ability to learn.I begin lessons with a lesson plan, but I’ve worked with children all my life, and I know one never knows how a session will go. Every time is different. One day they’ve napped, and another day they haven’t. One day they have a tooth coming in, or they’ve just had a doctor’s appointment, or they’ve been to school. Sometimes they’re getting sick. Sometimes they’ve just gotten a new puppy. Sometimes they’re up for learning, and sometimes they’re not. When they’re not, I need to set aside my agenda and work with where the child is. It’s surprising, how many skills we can practice during 30 minutes of “play!” Recently I read this article about figuring out what is enough from Becoming Minimalist, and it made me think about the “Terrible Toos.” We know so much about more, and so little about too much and enough. Enough. As much or as many as required for satisfaction. There’s a problematic definition! Satisfaction is entirely subjective. We are taught from babyhood to consume, to want, to desire more. Our culture is structured around appeals to our longing for belonging, connection, and more than we have. More clothes. More food. More friends. More tech. More money. I wonder how many people know what enduring satisfaction feels like. Enough is a boundary. It’s a destination. It’s power. Unlimited More is a black hole. Enough is reality.Unlimited More is addiction, or perfectionism, or pleasing. It never ends. It never stops. It’s never satisfied. It’s based on the fantasy that if only we had more _______, our lives would be better. If we were only more ________, we would be loved. Enough is a choice to say yes or no. No, I don’t need that. No, I don’t want that. No, I have enough. Unlimited More is not a choice. It’s yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes, I need more. When are we good enough? When have we tried hard enough? When do we have enough? When have we suffered enough? When have we given enough? When have we loved enough? When have we forgiven enough? When have we tolerated enough? When have we accommodated enough? When are we fast enough? When are we busy enough? When are we enough? Enough. My daily crime.